Monday, April 27, 2009

Panting, Planting and Police

Last week after I had recovered from my exploit to Discovery Park with Roy, Matt and I decided that what he needed was more constant exposure to dogs and people and things outside our neighborhood if he’s ever going to calm down in those environments. So we tossed him in my car and headed back into the lion’s den (if you will.)

 This time Matt got the brunt of his exuberance, but he really was much better than he behaved with me the first time! Matt kept asking doubtfully, “This is better?”

I got to smile and skip ahead taking pictures gleefully calling out, “Oh so much better!” We did have a fun time, although I’m a mite worried people may call us out for animal abuse as Roy was nearly suffocating himself on the choke collar and every time we passed another dog and Roy would try to meet it Matt would give such a tug Roy would body slam him. I had to respectfully ask him not to abuse our dog in front of strangers, but Roy is usually oblivious to it anyways.

Oh the weekends. Those two days you wait all week for that go by in a blur of cleaning interspersed with naps followed by late night movies and tubs of ice cream. Yes I know I’m not in college anymore but that’s still how we roll. The past couple of weekends I’ve had glorious days off with my husband…which means absolutely nothing gets cleaned and hardly picked up.

So Saturday, I resolved, was my cleaning day. After whipping up an immaculate omelette for Matt and some bacon and eggs for myself, I kissed my hubby goodbye and rolled up my sleeves. I got myself another cup of coffee and made my list of to-do’s. It included things like: mop the kitchen floor, pick up all of Roy’s tennis balls and bits of animal gut-fluff, gaze fondly at my seedlings and make homemade bread.
Well, I got through cleaning the kitchen and had just mopped when I decided I needed a snack. I’d bought a whole bunch of ingredients for a delightful little treat called “puppy chow” that I’m going to make and send my cousin Amanda for her birthday. 

Sorry Amanda, I’m going to have to go get more ingredients for your batch cause that stuff is DANG good! For those of you who don’t know what “puppy chow” is (some call it muddy buddies), its rice chex covered in a heavenly blend of chocolate, peanut butter and butter (can it get any worse? Oh yes) and THEN shaken in a bag of powdered sugar. Let it dry, pop it in the fridge or freezer and you have the best dessert/snack known to the microwave. Needless to say shaking powdered sugar bags effectively covered my kitchen and I got to clean it…again. But Roy did the floor this time.

By the end of the day most of my “chore” list was done and I got to thinking how bare our patio looked—even thought I’ve got some plants out there. A lot of them are from seedlings so they’re only an inch or two high…this is SPRING! I need color! And pots to grow things in…so I was off!

At Fred Meyer they were having mega-sales on their flowers. 6 cosmos for $1.50, who could turn that down?! I didn’t even really look at the sunlight/soil they needed I just grabbed what I liked and checked out. Dahlias, zinnias, cosmos, pansies, nicotianas, snapdragons, and some marigolds to plant near my carrots to ward off insects. You should have seen Matt’s face when he opened the door and I had a shopping cart full of soil, pots and flats of flowers! “So…so…after this you’re pretty much set, right?” He’s asked this every time I’ve brought home some more soil or seeds or another pot. “Sure, honey,” I always reply. 

Sunday morning was gray and chilly—perfect transplanting weather. I filled my little REI thermos mug with fresh coffee, donned my fleeces and wool socks and headed outdoors leaving Roy to mope at the window.

I now understand where the term “Stick your nose in everything” comes from. My dog. His nose will literally be in the middle of whatever I’m trying to read, work on, clean…you name it. He’s a curious pup and I’m not sure that’s going to wear off.

About the third time I went back in and out he bolted past my legs and onto the patio. What a new world of sensational smells! I let him check everything out, then drug his butt back inside and closed the screen. With his eyebrows pursed he began to give a soft, high-pitched whine/bark that sounded just like a pouting teenager. Then he plopped down with an emphasis and gave a loud, exaggerated sigh.

Eventually I let him out with me and after knocking over my zinnias and trampling on my pansies and knocking the buds off my marigolds with his tail and nibbling at my sage I made him lie down where he was quite happy just to be with me. Just as I got the last flowers transplanted the sun came out and we enjoyed a warm-ish spring day as I cleaned everything up. Then I made myself a plate of red beans, cornbread and fried zucchini while enjoying my handiwork.

After a nap and a shower I decided it was warm enough to wear a dress and actually look like a girl for a change! I had on my little ballet flats and a new dress and can honestly say I looked pretty cute. Matt was due home soon so what better way to greet him than outside lookin’ pretty?

I called Ammah as I walked Roy and had been bragging to her about his “loose leash” walking skills when we went down a long flight of stairs. At the bottom was a big slew of mug. I lightly hopped over, calling Roy to follow but, boy dog he is, he tromped straight through the mud. 

The next thing I knew a little tan terror was flying at us with high pitched yapping and teeth bared. Roy was more surprised than anything and backed up to me…leaving muddy paw prints all over my cute ballet flats and legs.

 I was doing the tango with one hand holding the leash that was beginning to wrap around my legs, the other hand holding my phone into which I yelled “CALL YOU BACK!” The owner, who sounded uncannily like her dog, yapped, “Trixie! Stay in your yard!” Meanwhile the terrier kept leaping at Roy but since we were between the street and the mudpit we had to endure the little bitch (the dog, of course, I’m not vulgar) until we could cross.

When I called Ammah back she acted like my dog was the one causing all the commotion! Doesn’t she know it’s always the little ones getting the big ones in trouble? Nonetheless by the time Matt showed up I looked like anything but the cute girl in the dress who had gone out 40 minutes earlier.

REI’s been pretty swamped, so he was pretty tired when he got home. 

Me? I’d had a nap and was raring to go! I asked what he wanted to do. 

His response, “Can we just sit on the couch together?” 

Hmmm…while that does sound infinitely exciting I think the laundry needs changing…you hold that thought. I do have to say, though, I wouldn’t trade anything for my man who just wants to “sit on the couch for awhile” with me! I convinced him to go to the movies, and from that he decided to find the movie theater and dinner location.

An hour later we were headed to Redmond…which is 40 minutes away…to go see a movie at a Regal Cinemas (we had gift cards—thanks Palmers!) and have dinner. At Claim Jumper Matt enjoyed a “schooner” of Mack and Jack ale…and looks rather pleased about it doesn’t he? After stuffing ourselves we browsed Borders then found our way to the theater in the mall. Only it wasn’t a Regal Cinema. Hmm. Now before this I might add Matt had a bit of trouble reading the directory and finding Claim Jumper. I had to repeat where north was three times. Anyways, we got in the car and through a tiny bit of help from my GPS but mostly explorational luck we found the movie theater and saw “Adventureland.”

My review: A 2009 version of Garden State with some funny moments, good acting by the lead but a pathetic portrayal of a pot-smoking lifestyle and it’s sad that the whole resolution was sex. The end.

Upon leaving the theater I asked, “know how to get back to the freeway, Tracker Tom?” “Oh yeah,” he responded confidently. Ten minutes and two cough-right-coughs later I suggested we make a u-turn and go back to this other street because I was pretty sure the entrance was on there. Matt turned left at the light, drove into a residential neighborhood and made a u-turn. As we approached the red light where we needed to get one lane over to turn right, Matt waited to see if the car coming behind him was in the right lane. It was behind us, so at 2 mph he signaled, got one lane over, stopped (because the light was red, but there was NO one around), and turned right. Ten seconds later red and blue lights were flashing behind us.

Uh-oh. What did we do???

Turns out any U-turn where there is not a sign expressly telling you it’s ok to make a U-turn is illegal. (In a neighborhood…REALLY?) He also said we had made a “Last minute lane change.” Well what are we supposed to do? The next U-turn sign isn’t for 5 miles and we just turned right! He asked Matt, “Sir, have you been drinking? And this IS being recorded!” Matt replied guiltily, “Um…yes.” The officer asked sternly, “How much did you drink?” Matt thought again. It was a “schooner,” of beer…just slightly bigger than a pint.

“One beer,” I answered for him.

“How long ago? And this IS being recorded!”

“Three hours ago,” I answered for him again. Delay would not make us look good!
Then he cited my tabs that expired a month ago. I’ve been meaning to get WA plates but BOTH Matt and I have to sign IN the actual office during their hours, and when are we BOTH off during business hours? Luckily he could see we were just lost and the only thing he gave us a ticket for was the tabs.

Then, twenty minutes later on the floating bridge what did we see behind us? Flashing blue and red lights. “SERIOUSLY?” I said. But it was the car behind us—PHEW! When we got home we de-fragged with ice cream and King of Queens. So that’s the latest in our exciting lives. Love you all much and would love to hear back from any and all of you!

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